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Corresponding with Russian women

Saying the right thing to a Russian woman is as much about listening as it is about writing. This FAQ about writing to Russian women will set the record straight!

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FAQ about corresponding with Eastern European women

Q: I want to try writing to the Russian women I’ve seen online, but I’m not sure if I am looking for marriage just yet. Do the women expect marriage from the men who write?

Your attitude is very normal, and certainly healthy. The only thing to keep in mind is honesty. As long as you tell the women you are corresponding with your intentions upfront (friendship, marriage, or otherwise) you have nothing to lose. Of course, if you take a long time to decide, you shouldn’t be surprised if the Russian girls you write to find men more interested in them.

Q: Is it true that you can tell a Russian woman’s values and economic level by her photo?

Absolutely not. Remember that the photos taken for the catalogs are glamour shots, and selected by the photographer and by the catalog itself. One photo cannot tell you a lot, and certainly says nothing about the Russian lady’s personality. It’s also important to realize that Russian women dress much differently. They wear lots of makeup and short skirts, but this style does not have the negative stereotype in Russia that it has in America. If you want to know what kind of person she is, you have to write to her!

Q: I’m ready to start corresponding with Russian women. Should I write to just one woman until I am sure, or correspond with many and narrow down the pool?

All of the dating sites recommend you correspond with a few women. This is sound advice, but some men believe they are somehow “cheating” by doing so. Others are so stricken by a single photo that they are madly in love before even the first letter. Some even think that a woman will be more interested in him because he is so “committed” after seeing just her photo. Think about it rationally and you’ll quickly realize all of these are false. A normal Russian woman cannot understand how a man could possibly pick a wife simply based on one photo. In fact, she will desire you much more if she knows that you wrote to many women but ultimately chose her. The important thing is being honest about what you are doing—that is in both your best interests, and in hers.

Q: How do I go about telling them that I am writing to several Russian women simultaneously?

Be honest. In any case she will suspect that you have other correspondents, and she may have others as well! I suggest something like this (but written in your own words): “At this point, I am writing to a few ladies that I think might be compatible with me. I enjoy corresponding with you and I promise that if I ever feel we are not right together, I will tell you. Of course, if you decide I am not the one for you, I do hope you’ll tell me right away.” This tells her that you are a serious and honest person. It also says that you are desirable, practical, and worth her effort. When, one day, you tell her she is the “only one for you,” she will know that it is true.

Q: I’ve heard of scams where the women simply ask for money. How can I tell if “my girl” is a scam artist?

Don’t send money. It’s as easy as that. No respectable Russian woman, no matter her economic situation, will ask a man she has never met for money. Of course you must be sensitive to her financial situation, and not expect her to be able to travel hours from her hometown to see you. Even sending parcels in the mail is a bad idea because the customs tax she will have to pay is often worth more than the contents!


So know you know how to write to Russian women. Ready to try?